so for your reading pleasure, I present a sampling of the worst okcupid messages I've received to date.
MARCH 20: trying too hard to match my interests. ALL of them.
So you an expert on flute, but not one on memory? It happens... so what type of business do you do?
[chaitea: wtf?! talk about non sequitur]
Like you, I am here to meet new people and see where it can go. I do P90x, so that counts for active doesn't it? But right, I'm resting after a night of P90x, so that's vegging. I don't play tennis well, but I have a racket and can play with you if needed. It's up to you to determine if I'm nerdy enough, funny, and interesting as it's all subjective.
[chaitea: in my profile I say I want to meet someone with an active lifestyle (bonus points for tennis) who also knows how to veg out. even if you didn't know that this message is awkward as shit]
MARCH 28: just plain freaking creepy
I'd like to make you laugh so I could hear you.
APRIL 8: taking the joke a liiittle too far
I like suns too. Although I keep my distance. One time a sun tried to hug me, but not wanting to burst into flames I told it to stay away. Our relationship has been strained ever since. I hope you don't get BURNED as I have. (Sorry, couldn't resist :-/)
[chaitea: you really should have]
[chaitea: you really should have]
the good news is, yes I have been on a date from this thing, and it went fine. the guy was normal, the date was normal, the chemistry level was... normal. the only thing I gained was a new dealbreaker: just say no to the male cartilage piercing.
maybe I should just dump online dating and meet guys at sports basement instead.
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| can't wait to read the hilarity that comes in next |
Sports basement of course!!!
ReplyDelete"i'd like to make you laugh so i could hear you."
ReplyDeleteHAHA! you have to give him props for being so perfectly awkward and disturbing, yet logical, in just one sentence. >:)
it reminds me of this: http://www.smosh.com/smosh-pit/photos/17-threatening-dating-site-murderers