additional patterns are starting to emerge in my dating life. not only do I seem to always end up with younger men, but I also inexplicably end up with co-workers, with no intention of it happening. VF wasn't the only person I dated at my last job - counting anyone from the full spectrum of kissing to being in a full-on relationship with, I was involved with 7 co-workers.
I just started a new job a couple months ago, and the symptoms are re-emerging already. I had a thing for the cute sales guy from day 1 - but his beer belly deterred me from getting too close. Then, 2 weeks ago, a co-worker from my team texted me to meet up at the Make-Out Room in the mission. should I have inferred from the name of the bar his intentions? perhaps. I showed up to the bar thinking it was just an innocent meet up with a cool co-worker who lived in the south bay and never made it to the city, but a few whiskey and tequila shots later, ended up convinced by his friends to take him home because he "makes an awesome breakfast". clearly, I always exercise good judgment.
we hung out again last weekend at a dance club, and things quickly escalated. all this time we've been IMing at work, texting all night, while acting totally normal at work - maybe stealing a glance across the room once in a while. but we raised enough red flags that one of our co-workers noticed and started grilling us about what was happening, which finally prompted a phone conversation last night:
chai: so.... what's going on with us? I'm confused.
work bf: that's a hard question, start with something easier...
chai: well i'm pretty sure you're on a rebound from your 3-year relationship
wbf: i'm polish, i don't know what a rebound is
chai: ................
chai: well i think this is a friends with benefits situation, where i'm your bootie call
wbf: you're too far away to be a bootie call, I'd have to drive an hour
chai: true.... ok well, I think we have a good thing going, we should just roll with it
wbf: and you would be ok with that? what if I had come to work after the make-out room and treated you like normal, and didn't talk to you, and acted like nothing had happened?
chai: honestly, that's what I would have expected, given my experience with all the douchebags out there
wbf: well, again I'm polish, i don't get the american way of dating
chai: (wtf - maybe I should always date europeans)
wbf: ok, so what are the guidelines?
wait. what? guidelines?
wbf: yea, there have to be some guidelines. like, can you date other people?
chai: I thought we just agreed it's probably a friends with benefits / bootie call situation, so... yes
wbf: well, I wouldn't want you sleeping with other people
who are you?!
chai: well i'm not going to go slutting around, but if we're not dating, I don't see what gives you the right to say what I can or can't do....
wbf: well, I don't want to sleep on your pillow and smell some other man's cologne....
chai: well, I can't promise anything. b/c we're not dating.
haha, to be continued. let's see where this goes. what he doesn't know can't hurt him, right? ;)
PS. if you ever need to test the character of a man, take him to the wreck room. the games create so many dynamics there - competition, team work, overload of testosterone.... that's where I saw the true jerkish colors of the cop after I decided to give him a second chance.
